Well, you said she's hell bent on being a free woman, so maybe the dim/not so dim tactic doesn't matter much. Do what helps you the most.

Maybe try to encourage her to find the "freedom" she seeks without ending the marriage. Don't come out and say this though, because obviously she'll object.

As you have found, you can't convince her of anything, so don't try! (this was one of my common pitfalls)

But it is possible she can find/do things to fill her need to be a free individual while still being in the marriage. This is what my love seems to be doing. It's still hard to wait it out, but at least we're still together.

M: A really long time.
Crisis: 5 years.
She's still worth it.

Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl