Sorry to hear that. I honestly think you should double-check to be sure there's not another person who is taking any money that the two of you have saved together.
Nothing from the accounts I have access to, but she has a savings account she never told me about and a new credit card.
And where is the money coming from for her private account?
Before BD, I respected her privacy and did not monitor any transactions on the shared account where she was the primary. I also have a shared account where I am the primary. I'm fairly certain what she snuck away before BD she used to get her apartment and some furniture. According to the papers I was served, it has almost nothing in it.
Get legal representation ASAP. Sounds like she's talking everything away from you and honestly I really wouldn't be surprised if she's spending it on another guy. Sorry to say.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Do I have any reason to still hope or am I just deluding myself? For months, things have only moved in one direction. Now that it has happened, I want to believe she'll let go of her anger and hopelessness to see things as they really are, for the first time. She suggested she might be willing to finally talk with one of our therapists present, but I know I have no reason to believe her.
What I see? She won't let go of her anger or see anything clearly because she is moving forward with her "plan". She has never resolved anything. Only in deluding herself.
Don't believe her...until you see it.
I personally believe there is always hope. It is a matter of where you draw your line in the sand.
Me:49 H:47 S: 16 T:27 M:25 My EA: 2001 His PA: 10/2007, 6/2013 Separated, but H still in house
Find your Shambala: a place of peace and happiness.
Today is her birthday. I was restless all night. I struggled to get up this morning. I feel sick to my stomach. I'm just going to give her a card and leave work. No expectations.
What I see? She won't let go of her anger or see anything clearly because she is moving forward with her "plan". She has never resolved anything. Only in deluding herself.
Don't believe her...until you see it.
I personally believe there is always hope. It is a matter of where you draw your line in the sand.
My therapist, who met her once individually, said pretty much the same thing. She'd made up her mind a while ago. That she is not dealing with anything. That our problems are easily addressed. That she will come to regret never having tried to save our marriage, etc.
Until now, I have only had one line, a PA, which I still see no evidence of. Now I suppose it will be the day the divorce is finalized (should it come to that). I have deprived myself of the comforts of a relationship for far too long. That said, I don't see me ever getting married again. It seems so meaningless when one person can just walk away on a whim without making any effort to resolve things.
That said, I don't see me ever getting married again. It seems so meaningless when one person can just walk away on a whim without making any effort to resolve things.
I feel exactly the same way. H is my love and if that's gone,and he doesn't wish to grow and change with me, then I don't wish to be married to someone else.
Me:49 H:47 S: 16 T:27 M:25 My EA: 2001 His PA: 10/2007, 6/2013 Separated, but H still in house
Find your Shambala: a place of peace and happiness.
That said, I don't see me ever getting married again. It seems so meaningless when one person can just walk away on a whim without making any effort to resolve things.
I feel exactly the same way. H is my love and if that's gone,and he doesn't wish to grow and change with me, then I don't wish to be married to someone else.
I know there will be some who think this is naive of us, but I have a colleague who went through what we are going through now. He still doesn't have any answers more than 10 years on and it still pains him. He's had a girlfriend for years who would like nothing more than to get married, but he's made it clear he is not willing to risk the pain again.
I also don't buy into the whole "more fish in the sea." I already fished that sea and caught my trophy fish. (Okay, it's kind of a terrible metaphor.) I don't believe there are simply more trophy fish waiting to be caught. I also don't see how I would ever be able to give myself over to someone again. Much like my colleague, I never knew it was possible to feel this much pain. Who would willingly subject themselves to it again?
