Wonka have you been keeping up with 2old's thread? I just wondered why you would ask him to email his wife back and say glad you liked it, have a great week. What's your reasoning behind this? I'm just curious as everyone else on this thread has been telling 2old to continue with n/c on his W and he's actually becoming stronger for doing this
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Yep, I do keep abreast of Mr. Old's thread. I can see why you appear confused. Welcome to DBing!!
Put yourself in W's shoes. When you thank someone for something, it is the polite and respectful thing to do is to respond back. Right? Usually we respond with "Your're welcome. Have a great day!" This is what we would normally do to our friends and family. This is no different from this interaction with W.
The dynamic needs to change and the first step starts WITH YOU. If past patterns have been angry, heated, and filled with pain, then to change up this pattern, it needs to start somewhere. Right. That also works to chip slowly at the Berlin Wall that WASes erect up after BD and whatnot.
This is not to say that Mr. Old is pursuing by increasing those text exchanges. In my case, Ms. Wonka and I only exchanged HBD texts for nearly 9 years until our first phone conversation in the Fall of 2012 and then after texts start to become more and more frequent. Talk about a massive glacier that is Ms. Wonka!!! Now these texts occur about once a month because I go all dark on her and she usually initiates after a month has passed by. I speak from personal experience.
You're right Wonka, I am confused, lol I supposed it's because I'm not used to this email banter back and forth, I normally text back after my H initialises it. I'm going to have to pay more attention to being more polite to H, lol. Sorry for questioning you Wonka, I get confused as the next person here when it comes to DB Hence my nickname, lol
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Very good Wonka, I had already figured what you were saying by telling me it wouldn't be too late to reply. As long as I dont start contacting regular again. I did change what you said by a litte as follows: "Glad you had a nice day. Have a great weekend!" After all it is Thursday tuff to tell someone to have a great week when its that late into the week....
And now I stay quiet again....I totally agree this was not only right but a good thing to do to show an upbeat attitude without all the contact. Especially when you dont get to show much anyways in my sitch.... And now I shall remain silent....
Ha, TTD, you might get confused sometimes but you do have a PMA!!!! I read alot of Wonkas stuff and know he is one of the true vets thats been thru the mud, the blood and the beer...lol
Hmmm, Gumby eh? Wonka must be up thar in age too...haha...
As far as more contact, NO! I felt pretty good during the last month of the n/c I held to. Really made me feel as though I had some control of the sitch. And that felt good. I always have been and always will be a good guy whether I finish last or not that is who I am and my W knows it...This I will not change....
lol Wonka Thanks for the compliment 2old, I need a lot of them to keep up my pma Well done for the short response and for going quiet again
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Now these texts occur about once a month because I go all dark on her and she usually initiates after a month has passed by. I speak from personal experience.
We're holding you to this.