My wife and I were high school sweethearts- dated since we were 16. Classic love story- we have always been in love since we were kids. Broke up in college for a few years as the distance was too hard. She ended up seeing someone else and got engaged briefly but she broke it off to pursue me again. Got back together after college and have been married for 9 years- have 3 adorable children: 8,6,and 4.
About a year ago my wife seemed a bit detached and depressed. She mentioned that she wasn't sure if she wanted to be married to me anymore, but did not elaborate further or show any interest in marriage counseling.
Like a dolt, I blew it off as grousing and temporary discontent as I had a few career changes and we were under some life pressures. Fast forward a year and she said she thinks our marriage is over and moved out and got her own apartment.
She initially said she wanted to divorce because she didn't think things could be fixed, then she said she'd like to separate to sort things out. She has mentioned wanting to try to save our marriage, but she has dropped out of counseling and acts almost like amid life crisis the rest of the time- new car, new clothes, spending lots of money on her new apartment and herself.
I am DB'ing as best I can- but DEVESTATED. My children are so young and so healthy and well adjusted right now. My wife is no saint, but I love her and can't bear the thought of a future without her.
I think I need to detach while she figures things out or I will end up smothering her
