I actually did need to know what was going on with the divorce paperwork and her intentions because otherwise I would have had to file a counter suit. Since it's switched to a dissolution "officially", I don't really have to do anything except wait to review paperwork.
Why do you NEED to know? A D is a D and dissolution is dissolution. The "need" is stirring up discomfort inside you and it might be a good lesson for you to sit on that discomfort sofa and talk to yourself through it. Perhaps W may very well change her mind once again and initiate D process. Who knows? Detach. When you do cross the bridge, then you'll tackle it with aplomb.
I do want to comment on the "going dark" discussion here as some DBers here seem not to get it right. Going dark means dropping the rope, getting busy with your life, focusing on GAL AND putting your spouse up on the top shelf in the corner of the garage and shut the garage door. That's how you become detached. In my case, I go dark on Ms. Wonka and I notice that she usually texts me after a month has passed. Meanwhile, I fill up my time with 20/20/20 intense workout sessions at the local gym, meet up with friends and going away for weekends.
When your W texts you or contacts you, you do what I call my 'Spock-talk'...state facts, keep it simple, and cut it short. You do need to think and talk like Spock when interacting with W on D/dissolution related stuff.
