1. Should I ask to meet in person? I kinda want to see her eyes if she is going to permanently end our marriage, and I want to have the dignity of being told instead of over text.
She's made her intentions clear. No, don't ask to meet her, what would be the point? You've got to quit the pursuit behavior, it's not going to stop the D.
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2. If we meet, should I ask her why she changed from one week saying she loved me and wanted to be with me, and some very romantic/flirty gestures, and hugs ....to being "done"? Or just say nothing? I honestly just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing.
Say nothing. She's a WAS, her mind is a stormy sea of turmoil and confusion. She can't explain her actions to you, she doesn't understand them herself.
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I went dark from Saturday night through yesterday afternoon, exchanged a few texts about divorce paperwork and her intentions, and am dark again.
Brother, you do not understand going dark AT ALL. If you are going to go dark then you've got to go all in on it. NO INITIATING TEXTING OR CALLS, EVER!!!! You don't "go dark" a few days and then text and then "go dark" again, that is NOT going dark!! That is pursuit, the opposite of going dark!
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My last text was something like, "I don't understand the changes in you since last Friday; none of this makes any sense.
= pursuit. Stop that.
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I won't demand you meet with me in person, but would prefer it, as I really think this is a decision worth discussing. I know you asked for time and space, so I will continue to give you that, but you're welcome to call."
= controlling and manipulating. Stop that too!
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And now back to dark. But even 5 days of dark isn't NEARLY enough time for stuff to sink in.
See above, you're not dark and never have been. But you NEED to be. So start.
