Signing D papers makes things painfully final and concrete. Do I fight or give in?
How would you fight it? If you were given 6 more months, what would you do differently?
AMEN....LUKE, I POSTED on your last thread before seeing this one.
You NEVER asked her why you two didn't sleep together...for 9 years.
WHat would fighting FOR your marriage look like anyhow? I mean, if no intimacy was acceptable to you so much so that you did not even raise the issue
then why on earth would you suddenly 1) want this marriage and or 2) act differently?
What would be different? Sounds to me as if you have been melancholy and lonely for a decade, but you didn't look inward enough, or around enough to notice.
That makes me sad for you and frankly, maybe a divorce or SOME MOVEMENT or some ACTION
doesn't seem harmful at this point. I feel as if you have been "WAITING" for your life to happen.
But that was always and only YOUR job...
do you get what I am saying? Please read my post to you.
I wonder about your daughter so much. What must she think of a man who would say nothing abnout his own needs for so long? Who would tolerate silence and zero affection for the bulk of the "marriage" ?
You only have your d another year or so. What do you want her to see in you?
I suggest CHANGE, which is movement. Your financial arguments make sense but the rest of this analysis is fear based and seems like you just woke up and realized a huge chunk of your life has passed
in a loveless r with a woman who does Not want to be married to you.
The only way to "fight her" on this would be to CHANGE and stop being afraid of her disapproval. Do what's right and let the cards fall where they fall.
A confident man is an attractive man. A scared fragile man is not.
A man who knows he has something to offer OTHER than pancakes is a desireable man. You're smart and witty and you are a good provider. You sound kind
but beaten down. What do you want to change in YOU? And why not do it now?
Is your T working with you on the bigger issues? I mean yes you need to be CLEAR and SPECIFIC when inviting people so it shows planning and inititave on your end
but are you working on the deeper issues about your self worth?
That's a biggie and it's key to ANY happiness in a r or marriage, or in you.
Keep at this!
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
