T, I don't remember? You don't have attorney because its too expensive right now. Is that correct? Just asking, i couldn't possibly imagine not having an attorney with where these exchanges have gone between you and your wife. I hope it gets worked out buddy. Feeling for you. A lot to handle. You are strong man, keep building yourself to be the better man.
Thanks cbt.
That is correct, I don't have the money. I could borrow the money from my parents maybe.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
T, how much equity is in the house? I remember you posting this earlier:
"It will mean that we have no equity in the house after all debts are paid off rather than a few grand we would have been."
So "a few grand" equity? How is she coming up with 5k for her share? That would mean there's 10k equity.
When I saw an L they said that if the house sold, even though the debt we both accrued was in my name we would be able to pay that off and then split the equity.
Going off the valuation done 2 weeks ago there would be about 6K left to split up now if it sold at that price. After the remortgage there wouldn't be anything for the first 2 years as there would be a settlement payment of 6K.
Selling the house or a remortgage is the only way I will be financially stable.
I don't want to sell the house, it's the kids home, I wouldn't have enough to get another house and would have to rent. the rent would be the cost per month of the remortgage.
The only options I can see right now is either offer her 2.5K to buy her name out of the house without a D or pay 1K for a D which I would then have to give her 2.5K.
The joys of life!
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
I understand, and if you had to sell and move you'd probably be out a whole lot more money that you just don't have right now. I think you're right that settling with W is the best thing to do. If I understand you correctly, that would clear the path to refinancing and that would give you some relief on your debt payments. It wouldn't be fair for your W to incur the costs of the "settlement payment" of the refi, so it sounds like 3k would be a fair offer to her. Her 5k number seems unreasonable unless there's more to the story, like you kept all the furniture or something. You might pitch the 2.5k to her, that leaves you a little room to negotiate. If it makes you feel any better we have a LOT more equity in our house, I'm going to have to shell out 100k to my W!
I just got a letter telling me I can't remortgage because W has a Matrimonial Homes Notice on the house and it can't be done.
I have emailed her to ask about it.
You didn't know?
Please, T, don't give her any money before you check things out. Get some legal advice, research the Internet, do something other than listening to her SOS.
When did she apply for this Matrimonial Home Rights?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I just got a letter telling me I can't remortgage because W has a Matrimonial Homes Notice on the house and it can't be done.
I have emailed her to ask about it.
You didn't know?
Please, T, don't give her any money before you check things out. Get some legal advice, research the Internet, do something other than listening to her SOS.
When did she apply for this Matrimonial Home Rights?
I knew about it but I thought it would only effect the selling of the house.
She applied for it when she had that massive spewing session calling me sneaky snake etc. and I said I wasn't going to be her whipping boy anymore.
A bit ironic her calling me sneaky after the sh1t she has pulled.
I know she is entitled to half the equity, nothing I can do about that one. L reckons I should be able to pay off debts beforehand though.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
I understand, and if you had to sell and move you'd probably be out a whole lot more money that you just don't have right now. I think you're right that settling with W is the best thing to do. If I understand you correctly, that would clear the path to refinancing and that would give you some relief on your debt payments. It wouldn't be fair for your W to incur the costs of the "settlement payment" of the refi, so it sounds like 3k would be a fair offer to her. Her 5k number seems unreasonable unless there's more to the story, like you kept all the furniture or something. You might pitch the 2.5k to her, that leaves you a little room to negotiate. If it makes you feel any better we have a LOT more equity in our house, I'm going to have to shell out 100k to my W!
Jeez, your 100K puts it into perspective somewhat! W took what she wanted except a light and some door knobs which she would still want.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
Based on how your wife is acting and responding i would certainly borrow the money from your parents and get an attorney. Not so much for the equity, but for the kids.
M 37 W 30 S 7 Together 10 years Married 9 years BD: 12/12/12(W filed same day) I moved to apartment 1/11/13 W and S moved to MIL 1/11/13 Peicing: 6/3/13 Reconciled: 7/2013 BD2: 4/20/16 still working on it
She applied for it when she had that massive spewing session calling me sneaky snake etc. and I said I wasn't going to be her whipping boy anymore.
I don't know much about it, but I thought it could only be done when the house was purchased or after the couple M, things like that. Yes, she is sneaky and very spiteful. Can't trust her. I would think she'd ask for so much money now, then later she would claim she had to have more.
Anyway, no need to explain all that stuff to me. I just wanted you to make sure about it all. Sorry if I sound like your mom.
It really stinks. Goes to show that she has no intentions of being fair or upfront about things.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
