BC39.....The fight for my marriage continues

[BC39]

Thanks Hopefull, I am doing all those things and will continue to.

I had an interesting little exchange with W yesterday.

One of the little things I've noticed about W this year is she's fairly judgmental of others and has distanced herself to a degree with many around her. Even her BF. A bit emotionally cold compared to the way she used to be. Not all the time, it just comes through every now and then. Theres just something that shines through at times of just not being herself.

She started discussing her BF yesterday, kind of putting blame on her for the ways things have been between them lately. I just listening and validated most of time, but I didn't really agree with what she was saying.

When she was done I said "do you think there's anything YOU could have/could be been doing differently?"

I was interrupted briefly by the kids, and when I turned back to W she was crying.

I held her and asked if she was okay.

She said she was PMS'ing but continued to say "I feel depressed sometimes, like I just don't care, people do little things that bother me and I just want to go to bed and pull the covers over my head".

I asked her if she's felt this way a lot or if she thought it was just the PMS. She said she thought it was the PMS. The PMS probably contributed to her state but I think it goes deeper than that.

W has never used the word "depressed" when speaking about herself.

I'm hoping she starting to look inward for her happiness, but I have my doubts.

.........

Just before posting this I called to ask her about RetroV because she didnt get back to me about it and they were inquiring if we were going to attend (I've already spoke to them).

She asked if we could talk about it tonight. I have a feeling she's going to backtrack and come up with excuses about not having enough time to do all the follow up sessions.

Guess we'll see...