"Okay - we have a split opinion here. Confront or not? Tonight or when I am back? Agree to "working on D" tonight or not?"
This isn't a democracy, we're talking about YOUR M here.
Stop asking for "votes" and start getting some b@lls. A real man makes a decision on his own and sticks with it. He doesn't think about what others think or what they think of him. This HAS TO BE YOUR DECISION. If not, then you are going to second guess yourself.
For God's sake man, STOP BEING AFRAID AND MAKE A DECISION! There is NO right or wrong answer. Be confident enough to do what you want to do. Your W once asked you to do what James Dean would do. DO THAT!
Ditto x 1,000.
Luke,
1) What do you think the "right" thing to do is? Do that. Always.
2) All this wishy-washy, overly-specific querying of posters here has gone far past seeking the advice of others into outsourcing your decision making process. Stop it. Refer to #1.
3) Ask yourself this: were all the questions you have been asking recently - all the specific "what if she says this? what if I say that? what if she insists? What if she responds in this fashion?" Was all of that REALLY you asking for advice, or was it a means to delay you engaging in what you view as a conflict with your W until you safely left the country and wouldn't have to confront her? Unlearning conflict avoidance,eh?
4)This isn't even a conflict, it's simply you stating the terms of how you will allow yourself to be treated. You need to MASTER this because it is IMPERATIVE that you teach it to your children. It is an INVALUABLE life skill and it's your JOB to teach it to them.
Do what is right. Be honorable. Be someone only a fool would leave. Be cheerful, strong, outgoing, and confident at all times (even when you don't feel it).
Travel safe. And do some serious introspective thinking while you're away. Come back ready to be who you want and need to be. Be true and honest and respectful to YOURSELF. The rest will take care of itself.
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
