Another thing that has come to light is that I tend to be anxious a lot of the time and it manifests as agitation. I "flip out" basically. When H thinks I am "angry" it's really not anger, it's my anxiety taking over.
I had never had an anxiety attack before BD. When I heard people talking about such things I always thought they needed to just "cowboy up" and put it behind them. About a month after BD I fell into deep depression and had severe anxiety attacks. Wow, did I ever learn first-hand just how out of your control those can be. Basically you feel like you're just along for the ride. If your H has never been through this then it's understandable that he misunderstands what he's seeing and attributes it to anger or something else. It's really important that you seek to help him understand what you're going through, and that it's not something that you can just flip a switch to turn off.
And do consider med's and/ or counseling. That's what got me out of that dark place.
