Guys...I have said before that I have zero, zero hope of reconciliation. We have had several talks, and she is just done.
They ALL think they're done, but many of them do eventually want to reconcile. A good friend of mine has a WAS and when she walked she told him mean, ugly things. She HATED him. Two years later they started talking and became friends again, now they are back in a relationship and she thinks he's the smartest, kindest, most sexy man that ever walked the planet. I'm not telling you to sit around and wait for her, but I often hear LBS's claim it's all over because their WAS is "done", but you can't believe anything the WAS says. If you want to end it then do it for the right reasons, not because of something the WAS says. Because (Sandi's rule) you can't believe anything they say and only half of what they do.
Quote:
Not sure if its a MLC, me, whatever...but she saw a therapist last year after I got home from Afghanistan...and recent conversations have revealed that those counseling sessions gave her the strength and ability to walk away when she felt she needed or wanted to.
This is why I do not trust counselors.
It's not the IC's fault. The WAS seeks enablers, and most IC's are enablers because that's what they've been trained to do. They tell the person what they already want to hear. If the IC told your W she was wrong, she would have sought enablers elsewhere. That's what WAS's do.
Quote:
But I am sorry, I cant do it. I can not accept her back after she "goes wild" having random, or even short term R sex with other guys.
That's certainly your choice to make, if that's a deal-killer for you then get the D ball rolling. Just make sure it's really what you want first.
