Window of opportunity or just a mirage

[Ambivalent]

2nd time,

I just read the whole thread, and I'm a woman. From what I've read it seems as if she is stringing you along. Why? Because you are too easy!

I have had friends do this to me, and I don't appreciate it. Constantly make plans and then cancel. Really uncool and somewhat annoying. Now you probably can't tell her what she is doing is rude, so the next best thing is to not accept. Or you can set some boundaries. Time is important, and she is taking up your time. You have held a spot in your life/schedule and she keeps coming up with excuses to cancel.

Stop pursuing her with the little texts of letting her know what you are doing. Stop trying to be there every time she reaches out. Try and be a wee bit dim. Do NOT ask her to do anything!

From reading your posts you sound desperate and anxious. Start filling your time with some hobbies, or something that places you in contact with a mixed crowd...men and women. Dancing , meet-up group or something like that. Not just your kids, but other adults.

You aren't detached at all, everything you are doing you are doing based on what she may do, think, or act.

I get it...I'm in month 4 of my runaway H. I don't ask him what he's doing and I'm not telling him what I'm doing other than work or school. I'm trying to let him have space.

If you were doing what you are doing to your WAS to me, I'd feel suffocated. She seems to be teetering and then pulling back.

Give her space and let her come to you. If she asks you out, say no. For you don't seem to be ready to just let it be. When you have gotten to the point where you really could take it or leave it, she'll feel that from you. Then she may wake up, or not.

Make her curious and wonder what you are doing. No more texts...if she wants to communicate with you, she can call. Texts are too easy and can be misconstrued.

What are your goals?
How can you achieve them?

If I seemed abrupt, I certainly do not mean to be. I'm coming from a good place.

You posts did make me think of when I used to date.

Get busier, and leave your phone in the car or other room in the house. It is easier not to keep looking at this way. Turn it off for a few hours.