Going over my old posts may show a previous pattern and it's tempting but I don't want to be relying on that as a map of where this might go. There are some similarities but it could go anywhere.
I think what F was saying here is to look at the pattern so you don't make the same mistakes when she plays the same games, not so you can see her trying to come back to you and work things out. It may help you stay stronger against her games.
Yeah looking at where my own mistakes may come up again does make sense.
Originally Posted By: lovethehub
Quote:
W: I will be starting a 18-24 week cognitive behavioural therapy in the next couple of months so will be really needing a bit more help with the kids as I'm not sure how it's going to affect me.
I am not trying to be mean but she will use anything and she knows how to play you. She asked you to take the kids more, you said no. She comes back a few days later and ask for 'help' because she is in therapy and you automatically say yes. Lots of us are in therapy and we don't need time away from the kids because of it. I understand how hard it is to be a single parent; when H and I owned our own business, he worked 7 days a week and we were open 9a-10p. He had to go in early and stay til everything was done so he rarely saw the children, and when he did it was to play and fool around with them not to help out. (That's not a dig at him, I just mean there wasn't enough time so what he had was strict quality time with dad, having fun) Where there times I thought I would go insane? Yes! I had two small children and one is ADHD and the other was having tests, surgeries, doctors appts, etc. However, I didn't demand he take time off because I was 'shattered'. As a parent you do what you have to do. She CHOSE
In regards to me saying yes. I said if she needs it and I can do it I will. She shouldn't need it with CBT, if anything she would improve. There isn't much more I could do that I'm not doing now already. I have no days left to take.
Do I ever bring up the fact that she chose?
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
