Thanks, TTD180. I don't know why it is so hard for me to ignore him. During the past 19 years, he was everything in my life. I don't have any family members here neither closet friends. He was the only person who I can talk to about everything. I loves him, trusted him and relied on him too much. I thought we will be together forever. Now suddenly I am all by myself. I'm glad that I found this site and thank you all for your support, which make me feel not that alone. I will try to focus more on myself and kids, not him...
M 18 yrs 5 & 7 yrs old kids H DB in 4/2013 H moved out in 11/2013
During the past 19 years, he was everything in my life. I don't have any family members here neither closet friends. He was the only person who I can talk to about everything. I loves him, trusted him and relied on him too much. I thought we will be together forever. Now suddenly I am all by myself.
That is why any of us find it hard to ignore our spouses initially. They are so much a part of our lives.
Focus on yourself. You are not alone - you've got loads of support on this forum.
Stay strong.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
Thank you, NQ. I am a stay-at-home mom. I spent most of my time taking care of kids, grocery shopping and house work. Now I started execise once a week. I don't know what else I can do?
M 18 yrs 5 & 7 yrs old kids H DB in 4/2013 H moved out in 11/2013
I'd appreciate it if any of you can give me some advice. H and I went to MC three weeks ago, (only once), then H said he already stated the reason why he wants divorce and nothing can change his mind, he will not go again. Today he agreed to see MC again but he is very reluctant. It seems he just wants me to feel better. Should I go to MC with him? Thanks.
M 18 yrs 5 & 7 yrs old kids H DB in 4/2013 H moved out in 11/2013
I agree with Mrbond here, though I feel he should elaborate IMO I feel that if he is bulldozed into going somewhere where he doesn't want to go then he is going to be negative all the way. You've asked for any suggestions, so here is mine I think you said that you go to church, correct me if I wrong. They do social groups where I live such as a craft club or a coffee morning. It will give you something else to do and you will get to meet new friends. If you don't go to church, then you'll still be welcomed They don't talk religion all the time and most are the best friends that you will ever meet Have a look in the local paper to see what events are coming up. The other group that I take part in is a charity committee to organise a village carnival. I've met a couple of good friends on there as well and I'm off out with them on Saturday If you've got a local college nearby sign up to do a course. It can be a recreational course or a certificated course. It could be something you've always wanted to do but never got round to it. It's never too late to learn, I'm living proof of this I've just started level 3 beauty therapy at 48 years old Anyway I think I've given you enough to be going on with You go girl!
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
I agree with MrBond and TTD. Chances are that he only went the first time so that he could say that he tried everything.
TTD has some great ideas for GALing as well. Depending on the area you live in and your general interest, there may be other groups you can get involved in. I live near a major hiking trail which stretches nearly 900 km and is broken down into regions, each of which has a club. These clubs hold organized hikes and also maintain their section of the trail. They also hold public hikes which are open to non-members. It's a great atmosphere and you get in exercise and fresh air as well as an added benefit. One of the photography chains in the area have clubs and our libraries/community centres also have clubs/activites available.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
Thank you for your advices and suggestions, MrBond, TTD and NQ. I will not go MC with H. I didn't go to church, and I think I already bothered my friend too much and she needs to take care of her kids and family too. I will find some activities for myself. I'm also worried about my finance :-( Maybe I shouldn't think too much...
Peace, some groups offer free activities such as the hiking groups that NQ mentioned Some groups only charge a minimal fee Check out your local paper or google activities in your area for some ideas I've got financial problems at the mo, it's just another problem in all our sitches. Couples are better staying together for financial reasons. My H is always short of cash, I just think well he shouldn't have left then!
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
IMO I feel that if he is bulldozed into going somewhere where he doesn't want to go then he is going to be negative all the way.