Me 10 months on. Positve agenda.

[hotwheelsaust]

F and TTD180, I do continue to try the DB, 180's and PMA with my daily contact with people. I can honestly say I am way better with my attitude and talking than I was before BD.
F, the N.U.T.S book is on it's way, probably here next week. Hopefully I will have the holidays to read it, same with the Psycho book. I just don't seem to get into the books at night before bed.
You are right to make the 48hrs no 96 hours waiting time. Patience with the W is what I need to do, yes, I get that, what is hard is the combination of everything.
It isn't just no contact from W. It's the lack of knowing if I will be home or not next year. Will the solicitor contact me again, or is the W planning something else. Will I have a home to go to next year. The lack of being able to ride my motorbike or spend time with my friends from back home. Seeing my boys more regular.
In saying all above, I am not sad while writing this (first time for a long time), it is just the facts. Rather than being in limbo with my M, I am in limbo with my life. The biggest change/bonus will be the knowledge of my transfer or no transfer. I will be that step closer to moving on.
I am doing my best here, but the reality is, there is very little to do, very little that interests me to do here, and a lot (others say this also) of people keep to themselves.

Transfers will be advised in 7 days now.

My reply to T1000, wasn't an emotional outpouring of grief or poor me, but simply a reply about having to do the performance for her each weekend (when T1000 gets the kids). I want to do the performance, but don't get those opportunities.

I have and will continue to accept that the W is not going to contact me and will go back to reading a quote I placed near the computer a while ago. "Whether I worry or not has no effect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go and making changes can".

I need to keep reading that.........but better still.......start believing it and doing it.