BC39.....The fight for my marriage continues

[BC39]

Welcome back BC39!
I had hoped that coming back after your break from the boards you would have made a little headway. The limbo period is the toughest, by far. It's hard to go through each day trying to act as if you are ok while the world goes on around you.

I used to pray that my wife would receive a "moment of clarity" and suddenly realize what she was doing and come out of her fog. That moment finally came, but it took much longer than I ever thought it would.

It sounds like you are actually coping very well. EA fantasy relationships are so hard for the WAS to extract themselves from. I think part of them knows it's not real, but another part of them doesn't want to believe that- and clings to it for all it's worth. Eventually it will crash.

I think your wife will eventually come to her senses and return to you. I hope you can hang in there so that when she does, your heart is still in it.

Hey Hopefull, nice to hear from you! I always appreciate your insight. Your sitch was a lot like mine. I hope to be in the same place as you and your W.

I'm not sure you read the convo of W and I from last month, its posted at the end of my last thread if you get a second. Concerning convo, but her actions since seem to be positive.

Our dynamic when it comes to affection has been interesting lately.

I do a lot of playful touching, some of with is sexual. She doesn't seem bothered at all, in fact she seems to enjoy it.

A couple weeks ago we we're laying in bed, she was reading a book (romance novel) and I was just waking up from a short nap. I was aroused when I woke up and playful propositioned her. She was all smiles but apprehensive because our S5 was playing nearby, but she ended up pleasuring me. It had been a while so it was great.

The other day W as at the mall shopping. She was in a store to buy a bra, but she went and tried on a piece of lingerie and texted me a pic. She said afterward that she hadn't done something like that in a while and thought it would be fun.

Other than these 2 incidents all affection is initiated by me. We haven't had intercourse for almost a month. (last time was the night of our last R convo)

Again, she seems fine with the sexual flirting, but I usually do that when S isn't actually possible (kids are around etc). I don't try anything when we go to bed at night as she doesn't seem interested.

I'm trying to up our one on one time. I took her golfing with just the two of us for the first time last week. She had a great time.

I'm going to book a hotel a couple hours from where we live for a show next month. She loves the show So You Think You Can Dance and they are performing. I hope she likes the idea.

I'm trying to keep things light with no pressure.

We haven't had a R talk since last month. During that convo she started it off by saying she hated talking about her feelings, but quickly said she felt much better after talking to me about it. She said that we should schedule times to talk about things...but she hasn't brought it up since.