I saw that you read DR, but did you understand it? Your question is discussed pretty well in the book.
When was the last time you actually talked to her? What was said and how was the tone? Right now because you are officially D'd, there really isn't much you can do.
What have you been doing for you?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.