Wife just filed for divorce...furious and hates me

[MagicJack]

I don't plan on being a WAS, but I don't want to get my hopes up too much if she is really leaving; that and I'm trying to detach and GAL.

I think that the only thing that will bring her back will be her missing me and having the space to reflect on things and realize there were a lot of good points in our relationship and the grass is not greener on the other side.

One thing that seems odd is that I have not yet received D paperwork even though she went to her lawyer 10 days ago to put her "final signature" on it and it was supposed to be sent to me this past week. I am beginning to consider the outside possibility that she held off on sending it to see how things go, although I don't want to get my hopes up and then get D papers in the mail on Monday lol.

However, I have also realized that if she does want to stay with me, that I need to have boundaries in place to protect myself. This means not staying with her if she is going to continue to be "friends" with these guys who are in love with her, or if she is going to be dishonest with me. After I found out about her EA initially, one thing I think I did wrong was go overboard with setting boundaries and rules (I came up with a list of 10 rules for her to follow in the short-term to keep her from contacting these guys). She initially said she would, but then after a few weeks she said she felt like a prisoner and that was when she really pushed to get away and I found out she had still been communicating with the one guy. I also made the mistake early on of reaching out to her friends and family to see what was going on, etc.

At this point all I am doing is going to counseling on my own, staying busy, reading these forums, and not initiating contact with her. I would like to think she thinks about me a lot and misses me at least a little, but who knows?