Honestly Tad, I never thought you were stuck. I thought you moved at your own pace and others "help" keep you on track based on their own experiences and needs. And your needs.
I'll be honest Tad, I have had the same experience. And at some point, a while back, it became the same for me. I just have nothing to say. I left nothing on the table either, Tad. And that's about the best you can do on your side of things. I do sometimes still have those conversations. My ex won't stay gone, so it doesn't seem unnatural to me. It's become a drain on my time and energy though. A long time ago I felt like it wouldn't matter what she said, I just have nothing to say to her. I may miss what we had, but she in no way can be part of that in my life any longer. It's just not possible and hasn't been for a long time. I thought about it, many years ago. If she were to come back, would I let her? And the answer is no. I don't hate her. I wish her the best, like I would an old friend. I could talk to her, but I haven't had anything to talk to her about for a very long time, outside my son. It seems to progress that way. At least for me and possibly you.
You may be right about the boys. But that's for them to figure out, still with your guidance, in their own time. My son has been the same. He and I can talk about his mom now, and some of the things he has to say are, well, let's just say "interesting". She's still his mom though, and I respect that and he does too. They'll figure out what they want to do over time, and how they want to interact with their mom. And they'll use you as an example for how to handle things in life. From where I sit, I see that as a good thing.
Sorry to hear your family isn't much help with your mom, but you are a very lucky man to get to spend that kind of time with her. And she's lucky to have you. Make the most of it as best you can, Tad. It matters.
Keep moving Tad. You're one of those that will be very well adjusted and "wise" when you're done.
Focus on your mom, yourself, and your boys Tad. That's family and they need your leadership and companionship and they don't need to share it with your ex in your headspace.
Peace, AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
