All Out of Options

[MyNewStrength]

All i fell asleep because of all the anger and frustration of this as you all have also experienced. I have a couple of friends but they but have newborns and I really don't want to bother them so yes, I am dealing with this by myself (except for the wonderful support here on MA). I thank you for offering to speak with me.

I am trying to take care of myself, but it is hard. I am hardly eating and I can't get myself to even exercise.....I use to run 4 times a week, well since the bond dropped, nothing. It is even hard to engage in conversation, even at work. People at work have noticed that "I am not myself." I use to laugh, smile, and really talk with colleagues, and my boss, but I feel like no more talk, all work....all business...

I know I don't deserve his treatment of me and I am so perplexed as to how he could treat me so poorly after everything I have done and thought I was to him. I have thought about sending a letter to his command to ask for their help in forcing my ah to stop the affair. He is so prideful that he would hate me for doing that and would see as the "spiteful" wife.

Maybe I should just do what he wants and let the marriage die. I am in so much pain because he reasoning is so illogical. I guess the OW is really pushing him. He has never been threatening with me our entire marriage and he is just someone I do not recognise.