Me 10 months on. Positve agenda.

[hotwheelsaust]

TTD180: It's not even the confrontation, but the stopping going dark to talk about something that probably really isn't an issue. It's an old car, it has insurance and I think talking about it to the W is going to bring up more issues and hassles than it really is worth.
It is more just me talking about what I saw yesterday, how again, it just seems that the W and friend are just so comfortable with these things that go on. The friend has her own car, a lot nicer than the W's.
The friend drove the W's car last holidays almost 1000kms, because the friend gets car sick unless she is driving. So wouldn't you think they would drive that distance in the friends car?
Maybe it is just me mindreading, who knows anymore. It is just I see these things and it makes me see them as a couple. The way they do things, doesn't come across as just friends.
Again I wish I just knew if it is a relationship. It might not change my long term goal, but it would put my mind at ease with what I am dealing with.
Nearly all the other sitchs on this forum know what the WAS is involved in: whether an affair, MLC or something else. I just seem to be completely out of the loop with what W is doing and why the behaviour or lack of any contact/interest. She organises a solicitor to split assets, I reply and give 2 weeks for a counter reply and nothing after 6 weeks. What gives? She wants/needs a hug 6 weeks ago when we met, she finally showed some emotion, then nothing still.
I just simply struggle with which way to go, to contact or not to contact, to allow the W to run the show or for me to force the issue (solicitor).
I think at this stage, I am going to wait until the transfer request comes in (12 days), then I will determine what my next point of action is.
I did get a clue from a family member that the SIL is coming up to the country for holidays, and she and the W are going away to a further country place. With or without the friend I don't know.
Again I worry that she is ignoring our sons, totally opposite of what she has always done.
I know: do not worry about what the W is doing. I cannot control her. It's not the only or all the thing on my mind, but it does make me thing. It doesn't control my day to day life, but I cannot get rid of the thinking about her. I am trying.