Well we finally had some decent alone time today to talk in the car away from his mom and he used it to tell me he wouldn't be staying over tonight because he needed to throw in a load of laundry. Then he acted like I would take it very personally that he wouldn't stay over. I said it was fine and he was free to be over with the baby as much as he likes.
I tried to change the subject bc I really don't care either way if he stays or goes each day. Instead he kept talking saying something like "I really enjoyed cuddling last night but I need to get some stuff done at home." Mind you he goes home daily after work before coming over and just did laundry yesterday. Later he said he felt bad not staying and the way he said things made it sound like it really was more than just a case of needing to do laundry. Like his mind was spinning...
I've been really thankful for the skills/ lessons learned through DBing in the past week. There've been days where he's down from the pedestal I've placed him on where I think, "do I even want that back." But I remind myself that how I feel today might not be how I feel tomorrow and I just ride out negative thoughts knowing I don't need to make any decisions about things right now.
I also have great days where he does everything right but then steps away from me, but DBing has prepared me mentally to take back steps or side steps in stride w/o giving up hope that we are headed in an overall positive direction.
BD: Aug 2012 Separated since May 2013 S born Aug 2013 Aug 2013 H agrees to consider 'baby steps toward working things out' H is/was actively seeing someone?
