Great advice here already. Much like AS, after my W filed for D, I think we had the best year of our entire M. Things seemed amazing. Great sex life, lots of dating, rare arguments. But every time a court date came up and I wanted to discuss dismissing it, she was adamant that she hadn't changed her mind.
What I didn't realize at the time was that while I thought things were getting better, in reality, she was just cake eating. She was still screwing around with OM most days, while I took care of most of the things at home (kids, bills, etc.).
I firmly believe that the best thing you can do at this point is focus on you. Start focusing on your issues, things you don't/didn't like about your role in the M, things your H may have complained about in the past. Work on those things, but also rediscover yourself....do things you like to do, GAL, meet new people, etc.
When it comes to your M, protect yourself. If him touching you is too confusing, or too difficult, or you attach expectations to it, then set a boundary.
What your H doesn't realize yet (my xw doesn't see it yet either...and our sitch is years old), is that each of us are responsible for our own happiness. If you're unhappy, it's not because of your spouse...it's because of you. So be first....be the example....find your own happiness.
