W emailed me yesterday and requested some info so she can complete the D papers. She needed some account numbers and a copy of the house deed. I sent her everything she requested. I haven't seen the papers yet, I'm guessing she'll bring them to me for review some time next week. Once they're filed there's a 60 day wait here in TX before the D is finalized. Should be a done deal before Christmas. I'm not particularly upset although I'm not exactly doing cartwheels either. I think I mentioned before that I've long since come to accept that this was inevitable, so now that it's pending it's really kind of anti-climactic.
Originally Posted By: 2old
I just wanted to let you know I have certainly appreciated your thoughs and help on my thread since I joined here in June. Although I still struggle with the emotional side of this, Thanks to you and others I am dealing with things somewhat better and cant wait for the day I can be as strong as you are showing....
Thank you, I wish my story had a saved marriage ending so that I could give more people hope that their sitches can turn around too, but I hope that people look at my sitch and take hope in the fact that even when the marriage isn't saved it is possible to not just survive, but have a satisfying, content, happy life outside of marriage. And as I often counsel others, divorce isn't necessarily the end of things. Who knows what the future holds, my W may yet come out of the fog. But I'm quickly getting to the point that I don't know that I would even entertain reconciliation.
Originally Posted By: littleGTO
It is amazing the personal growth that happens to each of us here. And, I wouldn't trade where I am now for where I was a year ago for anything!
Some people get there quicker than others, I read so many sitches here where people are well and truly stuck and I wish so much that they could experience what you and I have experienced- that success does not have to mean saving your M. When you get to the point that you know you will be OK in life whether it's with or without your spouse, that is so invigorating!
Originally Posted By: littleGTO
I hope that anyone on here who experiences the full effect of what a M in crisis can do to you as a person will also "pay it forward."
So true. I've always loved helping others. I remember when I was in college I was in a particularly difficult engineering class and people would frequently come to me for help. Near the end of the semester the prof asked me to stay after class and he commended me for helping others and then said something I'll never forget- "What the others don't realize is that when you help them you're making yourself even better, stronger and smarter as well. There's nothing like having to explain things to others that makes you realize your own shortcomings, it helps you to see what you need to work on." As soon as he said it I realized just how right he was although I had never thought of it that way. Likewise, the people on these forums that help others are the ones that seem to heal and grow the fastest.
