Cindy, I went to bed last night thinking about your H wanting the D and to continue MC afterwards. It doesn't make much sense. It's a pretty high expectation of you. I think it does show someone who is torn or tired or both.
I didn't want the D, but when my H pulled the plug at the last minute I had mixed feelings and misgivings and hope. Then he told me a few days later that the D was back on. I thought "that's okay, at least it will be over and I tried." BUT THEN he didn't file the rest of the papers. Days went by. Weeks went by. I started to get pretty angry that he was dragging it out. I was even a little angry when he started dating me again. Here I had resigned myself to making happiness in a life without him and he's back!
I don't know for certain what your H will do, but I'm pretty sure that he's confused, afraid and angry. You're taking the right stand by not actively pursuing something you do not want and validating his own desire for the D. With a little space, maybe he'll think it through and realize that he shouldn't go in that direction either. Be careful not to paint him into a corner by telling everyone what he said he would do. Action is the only thing that really counts. Take care. --z
