Thanks for your reply. It really did help. As I imagined doing what you suggested, and playing out what would transpire if I confronted her and drew these lines in the sand, I realized that -- in my situation, with her -- I'm on the right track. Doing so would have had the opposite effect of what I'm trying to accomplish by following very closely the 37 rules. It would have started a volcano of a fight and nothing productive would have come from it. It would have sent her back miles from me, and up to her room with mr. nice guy just a text/call away. And as I said, I know she was completly surprised by the way I acted (non-REACTIONARY), telling her that I've made the choice not to continue the old, shared "figure eght" dance of unhealthy anger and conflict with her. She could be angry and mean all by her lonesome. That was my new, healthy boundry. This also relates to our history and my thoughts about context and status of EA, which Sandi is drawing me out on below.
