We put ours down last year, H did it since I had done our 19 year old cat a few months before and couldn't bear it.
Why wouldn't your H be sad and in a funk? For us, I think, we want to be with someone who can share our pain, make us feel not alone. For your H to be taking these steps towards you and then deal with the dog, it has to be too much, I think, and that's just the way it is. I work with a clientele that can only focus on one thing at a time. It's a carefully constructed world and is okay if they add things of their choosing. But something out of the ordinary, even a sick child, throws them for a loop. Oh, they can cope, but something else gives.
Hang in there. Good for pulling out of the ditch, living in the now requires effort, as I am finding out. I've hauled my own azz out of that ditch a few times myself