Moving forward together from a mess

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The worse part about moving to where we moved to is there are reminders that trigger me all the time. Driving by a hotel I know she stayed at with OM. Going to a park a couple weeks ago where I know she was at horse show with him. I have to drive by a place a know they ate at almost everyday. It's gotten better, but it still pops up in my mind. W struggles with understanding why i still think about it since she says she is completely past it and its a part of her life she wishes she could just take out. She is very good about being able to bottle things up and move on. On the other hand i like to talk about my feelings and get things out. This is where we get in trouble a lot of the times. I know I just need to let it all be in the past, but I'm just not there.

I know the feeling you mean. When my ex had an A, I had to drive by the OWs house every morning, knew places they had lunch, etc. and it was very hard to deal with. Visual triggers can be tough. That being said, also being the one who cheated in my current M, every time you bring these things up to your W, it most likely makes her feel that it will never go away. When my H would bring things up, I would feel hopeless all over again and think "why I am even bothering, he will never get over this" and kept a wedge between us for a long time. Who can you talk to about your triggers? You will have them but find someone other than your w to discuss it with, or journal.

We have had sex once in 3 months since we started working on things. It really is hard because she just doesn't seem to want me to touch her. I mentioned in MC last week that I could not be in a sexless marriage and she just shrugged.
I am having a hard time with this and it's something I plan on bringing up again tomorrow in MC office. It's so hard because its not like I can "get her in the mood" since she doesn't like physical touch. So basically i just have to ask if she wants to have sex and everytime I'm rejected my self esteem gets shot and I begin to think whether she really wants this or not.
If she doesn't actively start trying to fix this I don't think I can make this work.
I know it will take time, but I just don't see her even trying

Not sure if it was you that I mentioned this to before or not; I had NO desire to have sex with my H when we were first reconciling, sometimes I would but he could tell I didn't really want to. We started doing something I read in a book about affairs and it helped a lot - get a little item that you can put on each others night stand or dresser and when you put it on hers, she has 48 hours (or whatever you decide) to initiate sex. Then it is her turn to put it on yours (she can hang onto it as long as she wants though, no time limit!) and you initiate within 48 hours. This really worked well for both of us;he could initiate without being rejected and I felt like it took the pressure off of me to have sex with him. I started looking forward to seeing the heart and it really got our sex life back on track.