Is there's anything left of everything we had...

[Not Quitting]

Had a bit of a rough night last night. Kept waking up with songs going through my head and each song was bringing up memories of good times with H. Managed to get some sleep but probably not enough. And no contact with H since Friday when he texted to remind that a bill needed to be paid. I simply replied "it's already done".

A little bit emotional today because I know where H is and who he's with - he felt the need to tell me earlier in the week because he didn't want S13 and I going the same place. I know I shouldn't be and I've tried really hard not to show S13 those feelings.

Beer buddy and many of H's other long time friends are being cut off along with S13 and me. His new friends have become more important, maybe because they don't know him as he used to be. His long time friends are seeing the changes in him and I know that several have voiced their disapproval of his new behaviour. They all think he's acting like an idiot and they can't believe what he's doing. Oh well, it's his choice and it could cost him some friends because they may not be there if he ever comes "back to his senses" as they have been saying.

In spite of how I was feeling with regard to H, I had an enjoyable day with S13 today in spite of those feelings, loads of walking and some good pictures to remind us both of the day. And I re-ordered DR from the library as I need to read it again.