In terms of my anger I do have a tendency to get mad, do something, and then calm down later and realize what I did was wrong. Thanks for pointing that out. I haven't punched a hole in a wall in probably 8 years. I smashed my own phone twice right after we got married in 2009, and then didn't do it after that. When I found out about her EA is when I ripped up those paintings, and I felt justified doing it at the time but I regret it now. With her phone I put it in a sink full of water after I found out she had been lying to me and still in contact with the OM from her EA, although she claimed it was nothing.

I thought I had really moved on from losing my temper for a few years until this whole EA thing. Her main complaints regarding me from before was that I didn't love her enough, didn't support her enough, didn't spend enough time with her, etc. I felt like in those areas I was trying and doing a pretty good job, but I also felt like we wound up fighting a lot and she would criticise me for some things and it put me on the defensive. I'm not saying the anger isn't a problem but there were other problems there, too, and I've never seen myself get so frustrated with anyone like I do with her.

There is a lot for me to work on, though. I'm still seeing our old MC and he said he would keep working with just me to talk about my issues and how I can be a better person, etc.

T 10 years, M 4 years, both 28 years old
7/3/2013 - W wanted D, we attempted to reconcile
7/20/2013 - discovered W's EA, attempted to reconcile
8/24/2013 - W told me she wanted D, filed papers