Still at Square One!!!

[DFE]

I'm starting to feel like a doormat. I was doing so well with our situation. I was actually starting to appreciate that my H had left. He had taken the initiative to change our marriage. Fast forward a few weeks. I'm getting pretty upset. He has stayed at the house twice. We've hung out and watched TV or played games.

He joined us at the pool yesterday and we went to dinner with friends as a family. He then stuck us in the car and went to his house. That irritated me. It was just kind of like see ya later. You can take our kids home while I get to go out on a Saturday night. Unfair.

I've been thinking about our sitch a lot for the last few days. What is he thinking? Really does he think we are going to go on as friends like this? He had his parents over at MY house the other day. I emphasize MY house because he has chosen not to be here. He has his own place. Why does he feel it's ok for him to bring them here and pretend he lives here? Because I let him.

It's got to stop. I need to have a talk with him. What are we doing here? We can't go on acting like a happy family then he gets to go home when he chooses. I am not ready for him to come home now. I just need to know where I stand. I know as soon as I say it he will run but I can't do this for another year or two. My kids and I need some stability. And he needs to start to feel the reality of his decision.

I'm starting to feel like a doormat..............