As someone who has been drawn to your situation, the past few months and someone who has been praying for your situation a lot I wanted to offer a little advice fwiw. You are playing with fire. No other way say it. Have you ever stopped to think that maybe these are some of the same feelings your H had/has about his OW? Don't know if you still trying to save your M or not, if not move on. If so be a faithful W. You can only play with fire so long before you get burned...
