Just friends is OK for now

[TryingToDo180]

Thanks for the hug Sandi, much appreciated I do get what you're saying and When I say we're friends, it's not like a BFF at all! I am starting to lovingly detach from my H, especially when he has shown his nasty streak of late!
Being friends for me is if he comes round to pick up our son, he may stay for a chat and a coffee or he may not. We'll occasionally watch a half an hour comedy whilst he has his coffee. I leave it up to him whether he stays or not, I don't beg him to stay or force him to watch TV. He chooses what to do when he gets here. It's an amicable arrangements with no strings attached. I like to think he can come here to relax for half an hour and put his feet up. If he decides one day he wants to come back then that's great, but at the mo I'm living the reality of he doesn't want to come back anytime soon. I don't ask him about his life and if he asks me about mine I just tell him on a need to know basis
I don't see myself as clingy, I've never actually said to him let's be good friends - that's what he told me he wanted to be. He said he doesn't want to be the couple that exchange kids at the door and just exchange a few words. He doesn't come round when he wants to, only when he comes to pick our son up. Occasionally if he's working in the area he may phone and pop in for a coffee. All initiation comes from him, including phone calls. When I said I wanted more than just friends, I meant that I feel like I'm starting to detach but I would think about it if he did decide to come back. I hope that I don't appear desperate to him, I do try hard not to appear this way! I've been 180ing so I don't follow him around etc. etc. Anyway I hope that I've come across as someone who is letting go and leading her own life because that is how I'm feeling at the mo.
Oh yes and BTW I'm very rarely in when he phones to ask if he can come round for a coffee, lol.