Also read Sandi2's 37 Rules, it's kind of the crib notes for DR. Implement those rules right away.
What you describe in your OP is not uncommon with WAS's. They are exploring a new life for themselves (it may be overt or secret) while trying to keep a foot in their old life too. They give a lot of mixed signals during that time and it can be very confusing to the LBS. I'm sorry to say it but things will very likely get worse from here. You've got a long journey ahead of you, be patient.
