No doubt he is reeling but having at least a window into our partners head would have been helpful on this journey.
I feel like all my reading (most right here on this board) and living with my W through all of this, has given me a window into my W's head. Your case is especially tough IMO, as he left you with NC, and nothing to go on.
Originally Posted By: Delboy
"Women are like monkeys, they don't let go of a branch until they have a good grip on another".
Thanks Delboy. I'll make sure to keep our tree house stocked with bananas!
Originally Posted By: rH
And it is true, in our case, I had some issues to work on, as well. My issues may not have caused MLC, but to have that happy M that H & I are working on now, I had some former issues to work through as well as dealing with the aftermath of MLC...the fears and devastation it caused in me and the whole family.
You know, I've become a better person, and have to admit it likely would not have happened had it not been for W's crises. Hopefully we can both enjoy the new "us" some day soon.
Here's another comment from a W deep in crises:
Titled: I Am Trapped Inside
I am so sorry for all of you, I am also sorry for all monsters in your lifes. I cry as I write this, I am cold and heartless, and as soon as I see a weak spot I am hell bent to make more suffering, it feeds the monster inside of me, yet inside I want out, I don't want to see you hurting because of me. I have made a wonderful man miserable, I don't want to, I need help. For all of you husbands out there, please don't hate your wife, she loves you, but she has a problem. The more it hurts, the better it feels, crazy huh?!
I can't post a link, but the article and comments can be found at: About.com > Divorce support > "Readers Respond: How Did You Survive Your Spouse's Midlife Crisis?" if you are interested in reading more.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
