One giant leap forward! - Part 5

[T1000]

Old thread got locked quickly!

I feel much better today.
Having work and then gym and house stuff fills my time and doesn't give me much time to ponder.
The weekends with kids can be hard. Not sure if it's because they remind me of her/family or lots of time to think or I know she is free and single while I watch the kids or all 3.

Generally in the past it has taken W about 1.5 months to start to to reach out again after something like this.
From now that takes us up to our 5th anniversary in October.
She might reach out sooner or later or never.

I'm just glad I feel better. Much calmer, nearly "I will be fine no matter what".
The rollercoaster definitely gets shorter to ride.

I would like to have some guide lines on generally how to act right now.
I'm currently NC unless it's about the kids.
W text me this morning asking for help buying some of the kids uniforms for September. I'm fine getting some of it and I asked her what she needed.

- Do I go in her house when I pick up/drop off kids?
- The last thing said about kids at the weekends was she wanted me to have them every weekend right now. At the time I was willing to oblige because of where we were. Now though I am not willing to do that as I need time to GAL.
I feel if I approach this or anything that could be seen as me being angry about the sitch will only make things worse. I was thinking of leaving it a week or two before I tackled things such as this.
- Hopefully I will be there for S3's birthday. What about after that? If she wants to do any family things. If you asked me yesterday I would say no but that would be me being spiteful.

I know it's early days after the recent events but I keep thinking about dating. Not to find someone to replace W. So I can get the courage to ask someone out, to have fun and GAL. I believe although risky, in some way, me dating will help me go back to my M at later date.
Might be an odd way to look at it. I've never really done much dating. Asking someone out is a total mental block for me. It was one of the biggest reasons for me having next to no life in my twenties.
W having OM in April was hard to accept, much much harder for me because of my lack of experience.
I know there might be some 2x4's coming my way, just expressing my current thoughts.