John. When a wife asks for 'space' to 'think', it is code for 'freedom to sleep with other men'. She is pleasant with you now because you have TOLD her that she can have the freedom to sleep with other men, and that you can always reconcile later. That is exactly what she wants! Of course she will sleep better knowing you are always there as plan B.

what you should start doing is giving the impression that you will NOT sit around waiting for her. So this through actions not words (you seem to like talking, and you are giving away your game plan and that could be your downfall). Like when you discussed going dark with her! You gave away the plan by basically reassuring her that it doesnt mean the door is being closed on reconcilliation. You negated the entire purpose of going dark! They are SUPPOSED to feel you are abandoning ship! That's the point!

Stop telling her everything. Stop reassuring her you still love her and want her. Stop giving away your strategy!

Me, H-34 now 38
W-32 now 35
T-13 now 18 years
M-6 now 9
Daughter 3 years now 7
Bomb 11/27/12 - OM
1 year in house separation
Reconciliation 12/2013. Healed now 2017