Today was an awesome morning over all. I had a great counselor meeting, and in prayer last night, it all came smashing down on me why I've been at odds at time with W.
I'm not going to take the time to list out all the reasons, but I've truly been insecure as to whether W "truly" loved me, so I have always sort of hedged my bets. Pushed her to prove it; held back on committing my heart. I don't know where the insecurity comes from, honestly. Maybe that's next.
However, it's INCREDIBLY powerful to have self-realization like that. I believe there must be a concrete change of heart and mind otherwise you're doomed to repeat the same mistakes; and for me, this realization is exactly that. Even up to this point, being committed to my marriage was in my heart; now it's resolved in my head..
W called me about the kids coming over, and we had a good talk. I slipped about my counselor, but I think she was actually impressed that I had taken the initiative.
