Weird day... I had emailed W last week reminding her of our agreement where she agreed to commit 100% and providing proof that I followed through with my side of the agreement was kept.

I had asked her in that email if she would reconsider, and she just didn't answer. I asked her if she had received my email, and she said yes, but wouldn't answer - either yes OR no. She finally sort of said she wasn't interested in reviewing it, but still wouldn't give me a yes or no - even after I said "Either a yes or no or I'm thinking is fine", so I asked if she would consider modifying it. A mutual friend said that she knows she's the one that messed it up originally. She wouldn't answer me on the modification either, so I just left it alone. It's obvious there is some confusion there so I'm not going to push it, and push her into an angry "NO!"

Then today, W's friend (who she is staying with) texted me and said W said I had a leaf blower and asked if I would mind helping her with the leaves in her yard. (Her husband doesn't do much around the house). W also texted me and said she had a couple of shirts her mom sent back from when she and I were out-of-state at her mom's place back in June. I went over and did the leaves, and our kids played, then came in and chatted a bit. It was great because I felt great - was laughing, joking. W talked to me some, then went off and sat in the corner and did Facebook on her phone. She would pop into my conversation with everyone else occasionally so she was obviously listening, but I think my happiness annoyed her. smile I stayed and chatted with the friend, and gave my four kids and her three Popsicles I brought over, and after about another 15 minutes, we left. Didn't want to over do it. Although, I have lost 14 pounds now, and was wearing a nice shirt that W got me, and I looked pretty good if I do say so myself!

I found out my D13 messaged W on Facebook, and W was very sweet, said she loved her, and missed her, and wanted her to come see her at her new apartment, and she was welcome anytime. D13 told me she asked her for us to get back together again - but W didn't respond. I don't want D13 involved in adult stuff, but I wonder if I should let her speak her feelings, as long as its respectful?


Reviewing my goals and accomplishments:
1. Going Dark - zero contact.
Aside from the visit mentioned above, I probably achieved 30% success on this, but that is going to continue to climb.

2. Renew my membership at the gym, and go at least 3 times a week for an hour.
This will happen next week, down 14 pounds!

3. I will get my garage cleaned and my mower working.
Mower is working, got garage 1/2 way

4. I will schedule at least two nights a week - one going out with friends, and one for me (reading, relaxing, whatever)
Scheduled a camping trip in two weeks with a bunch of guys, and invited some friends over for dinner. All my friends are married so it makes it awkward, but a couple is scheduled for next Friday!

5. I won't look at the phone bill again.
I looked at it twice, but I was looking at it 20 times a day, so I'm calling that a success. I'm not sure if W is embarrassed because of being exposed, but the number of calls and texts have dropped significantly - or maybe just laying low. I really don't care at this point - I am about being the "better option".