I have to agree with labug, your relationships with this (these?) guy(s) doesn't sound healthy. I'm terribly lonely right now and would love some female company (preferably my wife), but I've told myself I'm not going to date until my divorce is final. Now, that's up to you, I guess people do date before it's final, but that's just my choice. But more importantly, I know any relationship I get in right now would not be good for me or the other person or have any prospects for longterm health.
I bet it feels good to have the interest, especially when your H isn't being the H you would like him to be, but I honestly think you're playing with fire here.
I hope I'm not offending you, you said you're welcoming clue-by-fours. I'm just giving you my take on it, not the canonical truth.
