Blowing in the wind....

[RosaLinda]

Thanks to you all. I'm at work and can't really reply fully at this time but reading all of your kind and encouraging words gave me a real boost. I'm having a bad day in the ER. 

I worked the overnight Thurs and day shift today and overnight tomorrow again. It's so confusing and exhausting. And it's so hard to start IVs and read the medication vials with this double vision. 

Thursday one of my co-workers kindly (and I mean kindly, I am not saying that facetiously) took the time to explain to me how ridiculous and crazy I seem to all of them to keep standing after four years. Then today another co-worker used the same term, ridiculous. My actions seem ridiculous to them. That is SO hurtful. 

uR thanks for that explanation. I think I'm okay with the letting my H go but am having trouble with a couple of the detaching criteria. And am having trouble detaching from the people at work saying I'm ridulous

My MIL and I spent the day together yesterday at the beach. We had such a lovely day, talked and talked. She told me a lot about her childhood, growing up in the depression. And she's back on board with DBing - H gets her all riled up sometimes, and she tries to talk me into kicking him out Now there's a good MIL!

Then she, H, S27 and I got take-out fried fisherman's platters and sat around outside eating and drinking margaritas and talking. A wonderful evening, and a good memory for him when he's eating feemented oatmeal in a walk up studio apartment in Moscow. I hope. 

H finally listed a bunch of items  for sale on CraigsList. The kayak, my rug washer, the Caravan. Some tools. NOT his piano. Then he got indignant when the potential buyers tried to bargain with him. He got into a bunch of arguments and ended up saying "I don't NEED to sell these things." 

I guess he just wants change, wants to clean out his old life, but is not desperate to get rid of it? 

I found a hot yoga class not to far away. They have a 2-week trial membership. I'm going to add that to my GALs. 

Well back to work. Thanks for all of your support.