I wasn't a very good teacher. And she had a way of tensing up a bit when I hugged her, so I took that as rejection and started withholding affection - hugging, hand holding, basically any kind of touching. This wasn't a problem in my first M so I judged her to much and instead of looking for what worked, I began pulling back and did so for years until she was starving for affection. Things I was insensitive about really upset her and festered for years.
It's great that you are able to recognize this. I find this to be one of the great things about DB, at least for myself, because now I am able to look at things in a completely different way than before. Sounds like you are, too. If you didn't have this S, you would not have had this realization.
Sounds like some interesting things are going on for you..
M 46 H 44 D 12 S 8 M 9 T 11 BD 2/15/13 "Makes sense to stay together" 5/12/13 Agree we are 'healing' 7/13 Definitely Piecing 9/13
