Suckerpunch, moving ahead one way or another!

[MrBond]

“And anyhow, you filed for D, so there really is no disrespect. She is technically a free woman.”

If he hadn't filed for a D to end the marriage, then I would say that she is not "free". But when someone files, it's with the intent to legally end the M. It's just a piece of paper.

And to clarify and playing devil's advocate, society as a whole does not ALL believe that what she's doing is wrong. Sorry to say. It is one group's (within the society) that believes what she's doing is wrong. There are others within the same society that would think otherwise. While one person will say that DB is great in making you a stronger person, someone else will say that it makes you weak. It comes down to the individual.

" Legally, there should be financial penalties for doing what she is doing in this marriage."

That's why something like this isn't right. This is based on a person's opinion. You think that her behavior is "irrational" and "incredibly destructive" whereby she and her friends don't. It's all a matter of perception on the part of the individual. There is no absolute wrong or right. The last perfect person on earth could walk on water and even He had his faults and doubt.

The thing that DB allows you to do is to start understanding someone's POV whether or not you agree with it. But in doing so, you can see how you can attract a person back (or not) based on what THEY believe. Of course you're not going to compromise your own ethics, but when you truly "get" where another person is coming from, then you know to release them and have them make their own mistakes.

All of this talk about legal action, calling the cops, etc. is only going to hurt one person. His D. I don't believe in enabling his W, which is what the family is doing like an alcoholic and their should be consequences if she oversteps his boundaries. But it really should be done in the most compassionate way possible so that his D doesn't grow up seeing anger and resentment between both parents. In the end, she is the one who is going to grow up with the scars more than he and his W. And there are times that she seems to get lost in this whole mess.

Of course that's just my 2 cents.