One giant leap forward! - Part 4

[T1000]

Well I was going about my business a couple of days ago. I happened to open a chat app that I don't use anymore (W does) by mistake and I noticed it had "Only 4 days to go" and heart written for her signature.
I thought that could have been put on there at anytime and ignored it.

Well today out of interest I checked again. This time it had "Today is the Day" and some hearts.

Rather than play games and text all day I phoned W to ask what it was:

Me: Hi
W: Hiya
Me: I'm not going to beat around the bush. I noticed on Whatsapp that you had "Today is the Day" and some hearts and I wanted to know if there is anything I need to know?
W: Not as far as I'm aware.
Me: Whats does that mean?
W: As far as I'm aware there is nothing I need to tell you.
Me: OK then, are you going out with or on a date or anything else with another man?
W: (I can't remember what was said or how we got to it but she did confirm it)

We had long discussion about it. Basically she is lonely and says I'm not interested. So has had some interest and found it very flattering. If I'm not interested why wouldn't she go out on a date with someone who is?
I told her it's this sort of thing why I have kept myself at arms length. We agreed to take it slow, I said you were the one who said if it takes 12 months to sort out then so be it. She was actually hoping I would tell her it wouldn't take 12 months and just get on with it.
I said we haven't had time to even connect. You were supposed to get a sitter which you said you could. She said her Mom is ill and needs an operation, doesn't think she should be asking her and she is very worried about her. I validated her on her Moms health. I told her that she needs/needed to tell me these things.

The conversation went on for a while. I told her that I have been wanting to be more affectionate and get closer to her. She mentioned that she doesn't think it can work with us two and the kids. I said I don't deny it's hard but what makes you think some other guy who isn't their father is suddenly going to make it work?

The conversation ended with me telling her what I/we would be able to do to help us spend more time together but I would not share her with anyone. I guess I will see you in about two weeks then. She said "but what about....never mind"
I asked what she was going to say. She said I thought we were gonna see each other on Monday. I said not if your seeing other men, I already said I'm not going to share you (a poor choice of words I know). She said fine.

I went back to work. I started to think about what was coming up that this would effect. S3's birthday is in two weeks. I have the day off work. We were taking him out in the morning.
I'm not going to lie, I was contacting W to secure some time with S3 on his birthday and at the same time help her realise we wouldn't be playing happy families.

Me: Is anything planned for the afternoon on S3's birthday?
W: No. Just taking him to buy toys in the morning. Why?
Me: OK cool, I will take him out in the afternoon.
W: Erm no...it's his birthday and we spend the day as a family.
Me: We are not a family W.
W: S1 will have been at nursery and not fair leaving him out.
Me: He is my son and seeing as nothing is planned there is no reason why he can't spend the afternoon with his Dad.
S1 will get the same on his Birthday.
W: You are right...we are not a family but when we both have the kids lets at least make an effort to make them feel like we are when we are all together.
Me: I'm not going to pretend.
W: Stop getting nasty with me. Esp when it comes to the kids
Me: They will need to realize sooner or later. I'm not getting nasty.
W: It will not go in your favour.
Me: I just want to spend time with S3 on his birthday. It's not about you. Stop threatening me.
W: Well I'd like to spend some quality time with S3 on his birthday
Me: You can in the morning as you planned.
W: So you're not going to be there in the morning now?
Me: No
W: Ok. You are only cutting your noise off to spite your face.
Me: See it as you like.
W: Well just so you know I did actually cancel that date tonight. But thanks for reminding me of what a lovely person you can be. Your controlling attitude is such a great quality that you hold!
Me: I just want to spend time with my boy on his birthday.
W: Fine. Do what ever you want!

Not sure I believe she has or had cancelled the date. Either way she wasn't being honest and upfront with me and I won't have it.

I don't feel that bad tbh. I do hope she isn't going on the date but nothing I can really do about it now. She seems to think it's all about her.

That was about 3 hours ago. She just text me something about S3's school. We discussed it and that was it.