Tonight went very well. We had a nice dinner, and she was smiling, and we had some laughs. I was doing my best to maintain eye contact, smile, keep the conversation going. I think I did very well. It was pouring rain when we left and getting late so we're going to check out the new book store later. Se stayed long enough to watch a show for almost 2 hours. It was almost like old times, until she had to go. We were both getting very sleepy, but she seemed happy to stick it out until the end.
It's amazing how often divorce/separation/infidelity can come up. I had seen the show we watched already, but forgot about the couple that were separated in the same house, and how the husband had filed for divorce, then withdrew it, then filed again, and how the W was hoping... awkward.
Then there's real life. At dinner, W was telling me about someone from work and mentioned this lady and her husband had been separated for 3 yrs but got back together - even though he treated her very poorly. And somehow we got onto the subject of some other people's affairs, separations, open marriages and a friend who lives with a gay man as if they're a couple (I think it started as a relationship, and then he came out....) but she likes the companionship and occasionally hooks up with guys (random s*x, my W said). Anyway, it really seemed like she wanted to put it all in a more accepting context, because she had always had a very black and white view of moral issues and cut very little slack for people. We all tend to view things differently when we're the one's who have done them though. But, I am drifting too close to mind reading there.
The only really awkward thing was that one of the unusual marital situations that came up involves a family member of mine, and that led to the topic of alcoholism and that seemed to upset her for a bit (very sensitive topic because of her mother's alcoholism). And driving in the car is still a bit tense for me. not only because I'm trying to drive carefully but it's a good opportunity for a lot of silence and that can be ok in normal times, but a little jarring in this situation.
But, overall, very happy with the way things went today.
