Suckerpunch, moving ahead one way or another!

[adinva]

I personally would say "whatever" and find something else to do that particular night that's way more fun.

I have had a lot more time to process this than you, and I've let go of a lot of anger because I just don't want to be that person. It's not going to change my H if I'm "right," or if I'm "justifiably angry," or if I'm "setting boundaries about him and OP." It's not going to change anything externally. But internally I'm in a much better place because frankly I don't care who he's with. We are history. Over. I cannot change that, and I'd best get on with getting over it, so that's what I'm trying to do.

I think W showed some tact and sensitivity by bringing this up. I think she expected you to pitch a fit and you're giving her just what she expected.

She's not with you anymore. She doesn't want to be with you anymore. Liking someone new after you've been separated a while is not unexpected. She's not doing it TO you. And if you have to be there watching them because it's your job (really?) then be gracious rather than trying to control the entire situation and wanting to evict her and punch him. It's not attractive. I don't think it's who you want to be. I believe you don't think you have any control over how you feel, but you do.

What if it was 10 years from now, and she's moved on and you've moved on, will you still feel like her having a significant other on your family's campground upon the invitation of another group of people, warrants a reaction from you?