Suckerpunch, moving ahead one way or another!

[labug]

she DOES NOT have a legal right to bring him to my property.

Did you talk to a L already?

And, you are wrong again, because she DID follow up by forcing the issue and stating that she had every intention of bringing him here against my wishes.

She said that, she hasn't done it yet. Maybe like you she says things in the heat of anger.

I have had two real estate agents come in and give me an assessment of the value of the home

I don't know about your state, but RE agents aren't appraisers in my state and can give you a ball park figure. I had a couple of RE agents (friends) tell me what they thought my house was worth before I had it appraised and they were both low. They both were very clear that they weren't appraisers so there's figures were just guesstimates.

I am really contemplating moving her belongings off of our property and out of the apartment while she is gone. She will be away for 5 days on vacation with daughter and OM. She spends 95% of her time at his house, sleeping there almost every single night, and definitely spending the majority of her time with him. Perhaps it's time to completely set her free and move this thing forward....thoughts?

I missed this in your previous post. You do realize this can't happen, right?

And you say you aren't angry? People who aren't angry don't do things like that.

We talked a while back about your emotions and how you skate on the surface of them. You disagreed, denied you needed any kind of counseling. This above is what I'm talking about, you have the actions and the thinking of a very angry person but you deny you're angry. That's a problem.

I'm not saying some anger in your situation would be wrong but acknowledging it is the first step in making reasonable, adult choices.

About putting an end to the family unit, you've said before you realize you and W were equal partners in the fall of your marriage, but when you get angry at something she's done, it's all her fault and she should be penalized. Should you be penalized or should you say W, we both fell short and disappointed our D and ourselves. Let's cut our losses and make this as even a split as possible.

As far as what your W gets for being in the business relationship that marriage is, if you 2 can't comes to terms let the courts decide it. It is what it is.

I would like for you to get through this with the least animosity possible. Your D needs that from her parents. You feel bad about her having to go through this, then make it your solemn vow right now to proceed in a way that is in her best interests. You can take the high road.