Sthelen, I think it's good that you sent the letter. You are putting your foot down that what he is doing right now is unacceptable. (which it is). If he comes back, then it will be on YOUR terms, with your boundaries
-cp
M: 8 yrs T:14 Twins:7 S:5 BD:'NLILWY': Feb/2013 Mar/Apr/May: MC June: "living in limbo" Sept 12: H moves out Oct 20: reconciling Jan-Feb 2014:MC Feb 2014: separating, and H moved out.