Turtle Goddess she of the hard shell soft

[RosaLinda]

Gotcha J, however I do not see you as a prickly hedgehog albeit a cute smiling one my friend.

J "However, in the spirit of honesty, I should reveal that other than this very forum, I'm not terrific at talking about myself. I'm terrific at keeping secrets - especially about me"

I am unfortunately the opposite of you, and will pour out my soul at a drop of a hat. Not a good way to be at all. But I do not pour out my soul to my H. He just is not interested. And it is strange but I cannot remember whether he was interested 4 years ago or not. The past years spent in the MLC wasteland seem like a lifetime.

I cry a lot in bed, in my car, in the shower. The shower is good as you're getting wet anyway. I guess all of us are different, but I feel a lot better after crying and after telling someone my problems, whether in person or on this forum. I get it off my chest and most of the time it's gone. Until next time..... I'm sorry you really haven't had anyone to talk to, but now you will! Lots!

J "There's so much for my H to do it reminds me of the Tasks of Hercules. FIRST, no OW. Not even as a friend.
SECOND, Recognize the damage done by cheating. The "Its no big deal" attitude is possibly more painful to me than the cheating itself.
THIRD Be frikkin nice to me. Listen when I talk. Be a little interested in MY LL. As you observed H does seem committed in his way - but he also seems like a smart dog that doesn't bite the hand that feeds it too. I have set such a precedent of accommodation, and it would be somewhat a hassle to leave, so why go?"

No those are not herculean tasks. I think all except maybe #3 will come about naturally when his MLC is over. You'd think that #3 would come naturally, but maybe not if he is not a naturally nice and giving person. But maybe he just does not realize how his words and actions sound to other people. Once I was speaking to S27, ticked off about something or other, and afterwards my H told me that I was really talking down to him like he was a little kid, not a man. Of course he was acting like a little kid, but that was not excuse. I think you are going to go a long way with #3 as you remind H to ask you nicely for things. Hopefully it will sink in!